Messed Up

Yesterday was supposed to be a good day. I planned out all my food, logged all 3 meals into the tracker, and felt quite good about it. I went to the gym and did my new and harder workout. So what happened in the afternoon was not on the program. I found the candy hearts which were left over from valentine's day and ate them. Then a frosted cookie, also from valentine's day, started to go into my mouth. The rest of it went into the trash. I are dinner, went to school and are two chocolate caramels, which were on the counter. On the way home, I stopped to buy some band-aids and decided to walk down the Easter candy aisle. I do have a weakness for pectin jelly beans, and not finding those, chose premium tiny jelly beans which I ate in the car on the way home. I ate half of the bag.
Today, I put the rest of them down the disposal.
What is the significance of all of this? I was so in control, and so out of control. I know the repercussions of cheating on the program, I also know the results of following the program. I really didn't enjoy those jelly beans very much, but I kept on eating them. Did the candy earlier in the day set me up for more in the late evening? I do want to get off this plateau, but I am helping myself very much by eating candy. So, as my title says, I'm messed up.

STUCK on a Plateau?

Snow and more snow today. Yesterday was a snowy day too. Sloppy snow on top of slush and water. When will this end?
I slogged through the snow to my WW meeting this morning, and I am stuck at the same weight for the third week in a row. I have heard about these plateaus, and how some people stay on them for quite a while. My group leader explained that since I have lost quite a bit of weight, my body is adjusting to it. Basically, not to worry. Again, I haven't been as vigilant about writing down everything that goes into my mouth, and in fact, I haven't written anything down since Friday. I did follow the program, but logging the food keeps me honest. I don't want to stay at this weight, since I am still overweight according to the Body mass index. I guess I have to keep one thing in mind, my goal is to get to my goal weight, and then get rid of the fat around my middle. I do have a plan that has worked for me--portion control and exercise. Why shouldn't I continue with a plan that has been successful for 6 months because I have run into a roadblock for the past 3 weeks?
Later this afternoon I am going to pay a condolence call to a friend whose mother passed away. These affairs are loaded with food: deli trays, cookies, candies, coffee cakes, you get the picture. I am eating my lunch now so I won't be hungry when I get there. My plan, pay my condolences and don't put anything in my mouth except for a cup of tea.

Oh no, winter is back.

Yes, its cold and snow is promised soon. Not only snow, but freezing rain, then snow. The airlines at O'Hare are canceling flights after 7pm tonight. So far, all we have is cold. The prediction was for freezing rain this afternoon and snow after 6. This seems to have been revised. We shall see.
I took my mother out today, and we we almost blown over by the cold wind. We went out to lunch, the grocery store and Macy's. I don't know why we went out today in the cold, when there were several nice days earlier this week.
Yesterday I met a friend downtown to scope out a place for a wedding shower. We have a lot of fun visiting fancy hotels and observing their tea service. We decided to have the shower at the Four Seasons, which was the nicest, mainly because they were very accommodating, giving us samples of the food, and they have a lovely private room. Now we have to decide on invitations. Other than that, all we will have to do is collect RSVP's and find something to wear.
I haven't been down on Oak street for years. Now it is full of boutiques from Michigan to State Parkway. All the fancy places, Prada, Barney's Ultimo. Unfortunately, I was walking on the other side of the street, so I couldn't observe anything up close. I wanted to check out the high fashion because I am in the market for some new things this spring, with the shower and the wedding coming up. And, I have nothing that fits. I'm not planning to buy anything at those places, but it gives me some ideas.

Cave or Crave?

The pound cake got the best of me. I brought it to my class last night, after having a few nibbles when I cut it up. I had a piece with the class, and on the way home, after a huge computer disaster( I couldn't get my flash drive to work), I ate about 3 pieces--yes--in the car. Now, on the good side, the cake was over the top in deliciousness. It was moist, flavorful, and so rich that my hands got a bit greasy. Was it worth it? Maybe. It was really good. Perhaps one piece would have been enough, but the box with all the slices was sitting on the seat next to me, open. So I reached for another. After 3, I had enough.
So, now I will worry a little--actually, I will follow the program. I have just finished cardio on my air dyne bike, 40 minutes of it. I am back on track. I don't want to backslide. Enjoying the moment isn't worth giving up the goal.
What did I learn from this? I am not under control yet. Maybe I will never be totally under control. I did stop. I was so full of cake and it was uncomfortable. I was tempted to eat another piece when I got home, but I didn't.
Solution to the cake? I am going to slice it up and send it to my husband's office next week, where it will be appreciated, and out of my reach.

Mixing it up a little

On Sunday, I realized that I was really bored with my gym routine. So yesterday, when I met with my trainer, we decided to make a few changes. My big mouth got me some very hard stuff to do. Lunges with weights that I really don't like. Tracy, my trainer, has me do them when I work with her, now I have to do them independently. Legs lifts on the ball and cable work standing on a balance board complete the new stuff. More weights on the old machines to make them a little more challenging.
I wonder if changing an exercise routine has the same results as changing foods. Many people think that changing what they eat jump starts weight loss. I mean people who are on weight loss programs who are stuck often change up what they eat.
So my class met for the 2nd time last night. What a difference from last semester. These students all had purchased their books and had homework completed. I gave out Mardi Gras beads, which they enjoyed recieving. Tomorrow, I may give out a little snack, maybe cookies or something, while we have a discussion. The instructors manual suggests giving out pound cake--but I will have to make it myself. Maybe I will do that. I believe that I can bake something and not consume it all myself. I will give it away tomorrow, so it won't be around the house. Any leftovers will be frozen.
Is this a new me? In the past whenever I baked something, most of it was eaten by me. Not good. Should I test myself?
How does everything always get back to food?

A Conundrum

According to the precepts of weight loss, losing is good, gaining is bad, so how does staying the same rate? Today, after a 3 pound loss last week, my weight was the same. So is this good, or is this bad? Thinking of the past week, I did exercise a lot--36 points according to Weight Watchers. On the other side, I did eat more--a lot more than usual--but I didn't go over my extra points allowance.

Maybe everything balanced out this week.
(Or am I getting stuck?)
Maybe next week will show a loss.
(Is this magical thinking?)
Maybe I am starting a plateau.
(Is this the dreaded plateau stage?)
Maybe I should be happy that I have done so well so far on the program.
(Or am I going to beat myself up for not losing?)

So, you can see, I am dealing with a conumdrum.

When I finish this entry, I am going to join my air dyne bike and do 40 minutes of cardio, then I will do my abs work. I had a good WW breakfast this morning. I have a good attitude about everything today. I will stay on track. (or will I mess up and eat junk?)

A view of the food chain in action.

There was an unusual occurrance outside the kitchen window today. An unusually large bird was sitting on the tree outside, which on closer examination seemed to be some kind of hawk. We normally see cardinals, sparrows, finches, chicadees and juncos.

Looking closer, we saw that it held a sparrow, which it was eating. The hawk, which appeared to be a peregrine falcon according the our bird book, must have seen the sparrow near one of the bird feeders in our yard, swept down on it and carried it to the tree next to our kitchen window. It kept an eye on us while we were taking its picture. When the dog next door came out, the falcon took off--with the sparrow.

We have had bird feeders for many years, but this was the first time we have seen the food chain in action, and the first time we have seen a peregrine falcon up close. They are endangered birds, who have taken up residence in the sky scrapers in Chicago's Loop. My husband has seen them outside the 25th floor window at his office downtown. It was a surprise to see one in the suburbs, and so close to the ground.

Something from Alma

Snow is one of my favorite things. I love cold weather and the addition of snow makeswinter days a lot of fun. Fresh snow is one of my favorite snacks and I love running through the snow. The one thing that I don't like is when the humans dump a shovelful of snow on my head.

More snow and windy too

We are enjoying another snowstorm today, this one is stronger and longer than yesterday's. It was snowing at 5:45 this morning and it is still snowing at 8:54pm. Although it is fine, light snow, it is blowing and drifting all over, which makes shoveling a little bit useless. I'll have a picture tomorrow.
Today was the first day of my class at Oakton, and I was prepared. I was subbing for another teacher this afternoon and it was announced that the school was closing at 3pm. So, no class this evening. Thursday will be the first day instead. I bought Valentine candy for my students, and they will have to get it a day late. I am a little bit disappointed.
Instead of teaching tonight, I watched American Idol. I can't say that I really enjoyed it very much. It was an audition again, and more realistic than the earlier ones. Tomorrow the final 24 finalists are announced. I won't be able to watch the actual competition since I teach on Tuesday. Oh well.
On the weight scene, I am still on track. I did cardio this morning on the air dyne bike, did abs too. I booked everything on the tracker and even had a little treat.

Some more snow and a little less of me.

It's snowing again, and later I will go out and shovel. Its pretty, soft snow which should be an easy job to clean up.
My meeting is over and the weigh-in was sucessful. I am down 3 pounds. I skipped the scale last week, but today I was more confident. So, I attribute this sucess to accurate tracking of food, even if I was over the top with certain things and more exercise. I guess that the biggest reason was that I really don't want to back slide. I'm getting rid of big pants--3 pairs this week, these were pants that even belts don't help. Some of my jeans are big too, but they can be saved by a tight belt. They don't loook that great, but at least they don't fall down. I am not planning to buy much until I have reached goal and become a lifetime member.
What was interesting about this week in food was that I ate more. I used more of the ectra points than I have ever done before, and still lost. Some times eating more food--a little more-- helps weight loss. I know that that sounds crazy, but cutting back to the minimum allowance puts you into starvation mode, and you won't lose anything. So the conclusion is that sometimes more is better.
Today I am going to the gym and to Target and then I am working on my lesson plan for my class. Tomorrow is the first class of the new semester. Food wise that means back to frozen dinners. I really don't like them, but they are fast to prepare and low calorie. I guess that I am a lazy cook, because I always go for the foods that are easy to prepare. So, I am off to get some things done.

Back to Gym

Yesterday I went to the gym. Late Saturday afternoon is a busy time at EAC, and a time that I have never been before. It was full of people working out who must be going out later that evening-and mostly younger than myself. So, I did my entire workout routine, and by the time I was finished, the place had cleared out. When I got home, dinner was on the table.

Friday was a good adventure. The concert-recital was good and afterwards we had lunch at Le Colonial, a Viet Namese restuarant on Rush Street in Chicago. I ordered soup and a shrimp stir fry dish. It was well prepared and delicious. The resturant was featured on "Check Please" last week and was described as being very romantic. It was quite nice, but I didn't go to the 2nd floor to see the bar, which was described as spectacular. My husband did agree that the bar was very nice.
When I finish this blog, I am going to book all my food from the past two days. I'm slipping again. So, I worked out, and plan to do so again today--I made up for the workout, negatively, by not booking. What am I going to do. Tomorrow is meeting day. I did buy a small bag of chocolate candy, of which I have had 2 pieces--one each day. This is a kind of treat that I can handle. It seems strange that I can cram all kinds of junk into my mouth, but I can eat one piece of chocolate, and not go overboard.
The musicians from Friday's concert, David Plylar, composer and piano and Allison Lowell, oboe. They played a lovely recital on a very cold day.

A Surprise Shopping Trip

Yesterday I stopped by Carson's to buy some face cream because Clinique had a gift with purchase and came home not only with the cream, but with a new coat. I needed a new winter coat, since my coats are many years old, and not realy warm. So wandering around (a bad thing to do when you weren't planning to buy anything) I found some fur trimmed coats at 70% off. Now retailing is really stupid. The store is featuring resort and spring fashion when the outside temp is 10 degrees. All the winter stuff, whatever is left, is on sale. So, I tried several Dr. Zhivago style coats on, and came home with a chocolate brown one with a fur collar and cuffs. My husband liked it and thought that it looked like I paid a lot more for it than I did.
On the weight scene, I've been bad and good. On the bad side, I still can't keep my hands of candy. On the good side, I've been booking everything that goes into my mouth on the points tracker. That gives me a feeling of being a little bit in control. Monday will tell the story of my plan this week.
My husband and I are going to a concert today at Fourth Presbyterian Church on Michigan Ave. One of my son's friends, Allison Lowell, is playing, so we decided to take the CTA down, enjoy the concert and have a nice lunch. I am looking forward to hearing her, since she is playing a pice by David Plylar, a composition student at the Eastman School. My son recorded his String Quartet last year, and enjoyed playing his compositions. It should be a nice day, since it is sunny and a little bit warmer.

A Little Bit Better

So, Monday was my WW day, and I didn't go to the usual meeting since I had to take my mother to the Doctor. Well, do I blow off the meeting , or do I deal with my eating disasters? My work meeting was canceled because of the cold, which opened up a time slot for WW. I went to the meeting and took advantage of not weighing in. This was my compromise. I have been very good about booking my food for the past few days, including tortilla chips and gum drops. So, I hope that I can turn this bad situation around.

Yesterday we had a snow storm. The forecast was for light snow, which it was, but it lasted all day. It was pretty slippery for driving, and the car windows were covered up in about an hour. Today it is very cold and windy. I went to the gym at 7:30 am for personal training. Now, I'm just relaxing around the house. Seems like a good day to plan for my class next week. I have all of my xeroxing sent out, so now I just have to write the lesson plans.

This seems like a good day to post some more pictures of warm Puerto Vallarta. I did promise a picture of me in my new bathing suit. I do like the picture of art on the beach better.

I've Hit the Wall

My weight loss progress seems to have hit the wall. I've had a hard time following the program and can't seem to get motivated. I've been sneaking food and not booking it, and I've been eating things that I have no business putting in my mouth. I've been here before on my weight loss adventures, and I've gotten stuck in losing and gaining the same 1 or 2 pounds.
I am so frustrated because I've never been as sucessful as I have been recently and never been this focused before. Last week I vowed to follow the program and write everything down, and I didn't do it. I didn't go to the gym or exercise at home enough. I am afraid to go to my meeting today because I expect to have a big gain.
It seems that I am starting on a big backslide. I don't want to do this. I don't want to go back to being heavy. Being so close to my goal--about 15 pounds--I don't want to mess up. This has taken me 5 months, and I seem to be undoing it in a few weeks. So, will I go to the meeting and face up to my recent failings? Will I be able to get back on track?